When you say “I do” to your partner on your wedding day, you’re committing to more than just a ring on your finger. You’re making promises and commitments that you’ll work to fulfill for the rest of your life, and oftentimes you express these promises in the wedding views you read before you officially tie the knot. Writing your own wedding vows is an incredibly personal experience for both you and your partner, but at the same time, many people struggle to find the perfect words to say on their big day. We can’t write the words for you, but we do have some tips for writing them and some tricks for getting past writer’s block if you’ve become stuck. Below, we share some tips for writing the perfect vows for your wedding.
Perfecting Your Wedding Vows
Your wedding vows are intrinsically personal, which means we’re not going to be able to dictate exactly what you should say to your spouse. Don’t get us wrong, there are plenty of things we can take care of on your wedding day, like delivering the perfect venue, providing dazzling decor and crafting an exquisite food and drink menu, but we can’t write your vows for you. That being said, we know some starting points and some ways to approach writer’s block that should help make the process easier. Here are our tips:
Consult With Your Spouse
If you’ll be writing your own vows, talk with your future spouse about whether or not you want to write them together or separately. Many people automatically assume that you’ll write your own vows and keep them a secret until you’re at the altar, but it doesn’t have to be like that. We’ve heard beautiful vows from couples who clearly worked together to write two vows that come together as one as they are read. If you want to write your own vows, but you don’t want to do it by yourself, consider working with your future spouse to create your vows together.
Talk About Length and Style
If you’ll be writing them separately, it’s still a good idea to talk a little bit about length and style. Keeping your vows similar in length is easier for both parties, and it might be simpler to keep the use the same phrasing throughout in terms of “I promise to,” “I vow to,” “I will always,” etc. You definitely don’t need to have the same style or length, but some couples find it helpful to discuss before they start writing their vows.
Getting Past Writer’s Block
If you’re stuck along the way, or you’re just trying to decide the best way to say everything you want to say to your future spouse, we’ve come up with a few talking points that can help you put pen to paper. When making your vows, consider writing about:
- The best qualities of your future spouse.
- How they make you a better person.
- What you love most about them.
- How you’ve grown together in your relationship.
- The obstacles and challenges you’ve overcome together.
- How you want to make them feel every day for the rest of your life.
Finding The Order
Sometimes the hardest part of writing your vows isn’t finding the right words, it’s finding the right order. Again, it’s important to remember that they are your vows, so you can declare your love in any way you like, but many vows tend to have a certain flow to them. Oftentimes they begin with a declaration of love where you tell your partner why you are so in love with them and why they are the only person for you. Then after you’ve told your spouse why you love them, you can transition to your promises. Now is when you’ll vow to love them, to honor them, to cherish them, to always make breakfast in bed on Sundays, you name it. And after you make your promises, you can finish by letting them know you’ll work to fulfill those vows for the rest of your life.
And finally, one of the best tips that we can give is that you shouldn’t wait until the last minute to write your vows. We know that it can be intimidating to start, but the pressure is only going to build as you get closer to your wedding day. Write them at least a week before your wedding, and take time to practice them a couple times a day in the mirror. Even if you’ll be reading them off note cards, practicing them will make everything easier on the big day. Don’t put your vows off until the last minute.
We know that your vows will be perfect, and we know that writing your vows will be easier to do if you have faith that everything else with your wedding is in order. Let Entourage Events Groups handle other aspects like the venue, the decor, the music and the catering so that you can focus your attention on your future spouse and your vows. To learn more about how we can handle all those aspects and more, reach out to our team on our Contact Page.